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June 04, 2008



knowing how to do those things comes with practice. and still I fail sometimes. becoming a mother changes you forever. you may struggle with being present in the moment again but probably not the way you did before because its no longer about you. You are forever changed. You grew a life within you and bringing it into the world automatically shifts your thinking to outside of yourself. I can't explain it. My friend told me that no matter how bad work was, when she went to pick up the baby/toddler at daycare at the end of the day, nothing else mattered. I could not relate in the least because when something bothers me I ruminate, analyze, fester for looong periods of time. But then I had a baby and guess what...she was right! It just brings into sharp focus what is important. And when there is a little person demanding so much from you, you really are forced to ignore anything but the present much of the time. That gets frustrating too but you learn to cool your to-do lists and make peace with the fact that it will NEVER be complete and that is OKAY!
On a more superficial level, music (LOUD music in the car) and long drives in the orange orchards really help me clear my head as well. And making sure i take time for myself, which I do late at night when everyone else is asleep. I sacrifice a little sleep to do it, but I feel less frantic for it.
I'm so glad things are going well for you!


I'm not a mom (yet... swim, spermies, swim!), but somehow I have managed to live in the moment most of the time. After I had to leave my dream job because of my health issues, I realized that I really wasn't going to enjoy living unless I focused on what was going to make me feel the best at any given moment, since I never know *how* I'm going to be feeling. It's ironic you write this, because this week in particular I have had that to-do list in my head and basically have had to ignore it because I've been feeling like crap, and I was just thinking Tuesday evening--when I decided that I was *not* going to the grocery store because that could wait but my aching body could not--how proud I was that I was actually paying attention to the moment rather than the list.

It's not easy, but I think the more you do it, the more you see the positive impact in your life, and the easier it becomes.


This sentence: "Suddenly, what the books say doesn't matter as much as what my heart whispers." is so incredibly insightful and inspiring. Wish all of us as parents -- and as people -- could heed that wisdom a bit more! Truly I do think pulling away the peripheral and getting a mindset of gratitude brings me in the moment...especially when I'm feeling the least "thankful." Redirection. Slowing. Taking the thoughts off myself (and what I could/should/ought to be doing) and loving the what is living/doing/going on around me...that helps.

You sound more grounded than you give yourself credit for! Take the time you need...revel in Thea and John, and when things seem appropriately timed (re: not a nagging obligation, but an appealing opportunity), we'll get out for some coffee/tea!

Kiss Thea for me...and John, too!


your perspective is forever changed, not something anyone could have told you before, you wouldn't have understood.... but you know now, "Happiness is a journey, not a destination. For a long time it seemed to me that life was about to begin -- real life. But there was always some obstacle in the way, something to be gotten through first, some unfinished business, time still to be served, a debt to be paid. At last it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life. This perspective has helped me to see there is no way to happiness. Happiness is the way. So treasure every moment you have and remember that time waits for no one." ~ Souza

Anne Boleyn

I try to make two lists when I get possessed with getting it all done, which I have never accomplished, even with the lists. The first is the "Realist" and the second is the"Idealist". Sometimes I write things on the lists that I've already done, just so I can cross something off.

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